Devastatingly sad in a nostalgic liminal way

I’m looking for a book about yearning for a life you’ll never have. Something incredibly sad, but also unsettling and liminal, something that makes you wish you lived something you didn’t. Something like Never Let Me Go or Earthlings. I can’t think of any other examples since I know it’s a really specific feeling but I’ve been sad in this way lately and want something like this to read. Thanks 🙂