I'm going to make this kind of short and not get into too many details (ironically, I will be getting into details), but I have someone in my life who is:
- Enjoys gaslighting me (words: "…I like twisting things and messing with you…", "…so I'll say something happened that didn't… if I feel like I'm losing an argument…", putting things like food in our mailbox and saying they didn't).
- Telling people such as neighbors that I'm crazy (recently had a neighbor stick up for me because I guess he warned them that I'm crazy – unsure if joke, but I would prefer he didn't tell people this).
- Crticices everything I do (ex., considers my career to be "doing nothing", belittles and mocks my academic pursuits (working on obtaining an MD).
- Admits to "being the king of passive aggressive".
- Has to make everything a competition (this one is weird and I'm not sure why things have to be a competition or 'verbal spar' as he calls it so much of the time).
- Enjoys having power over others (such as financial, emotional, etc.)
Semi-related list of person's beliefs, might make picking the 'type' of toxicity out:
- Is very bitter toward women for some reason (something-something-6ft tool/6 pack/6 figure rule, top 10% of men get 90% of women, etc.).
- Thinks all Western medicine is a scam.
- Bitter about being short.
- Focuses a lot on manliness and being manly.
- Anti-feminism, thinks most mental health is people just being weak, etc., etc., etc.
I'm not sure if these qualities are narcissism, general emotional immaturity, immense insecurity (leaning toward this) or something else, but somehow, I've let them in my head, and I would like a book that gives me coping tools and mechanisms to effectively lessen the emotional and mental impact of the negative things this person does to me. I plan on removing myself from the situation soon, but until then, I'm a little stuck.
tl:dr; Books for dealing with people that use gaslighting, enjoy upsetting others, and are probably really insecure and angry on the inside.
by medfox86