Book(s) with a female protagonist about shapeshifters (that aren’t “Paranormal” or otherwise dont fall in to the pitfalls of normal paranormal books)

So basically the title. Im sure at least some of you reading this will know what i mean intimately.

Im interested in finding book(s) that feature shapeshifters but it seems 99% of the books that have it as a main theme or something that is constantly present, or otherwise a main feature of the world, comes under the catagory of "paranormal" and by extension, falls in to many pitfalls that just turn me off these kind of books immediately.

What are these pitfalls?

1. The Animal/whatever form is implied to be a seperate entity. No "My wolf" or "my dragon" BS that is so common in these kind of books, Please.
2. Romance is the focus and/or the female lead basically spends the whole book hiding behind a male romance interest. This usually results in the female lead to have the same personality or motivations as a plank of wood.
3. "Alpha" BS. It seems even if its not about werewolves, the word "Alpha" gets thrown around somewhere. I do not want to see this word anywhere.
4. This one is less important – Set in the modern day. It seems every paranormal book and its mothers kitchen sink seems to be set in the modern day

So…Basically, if it has none of the above 4 things, then its certainly worth mentioning!

Ideally i'd like the book(s) to be Fantasy or Scifi, though that isnt a hard requirement for a suggestion. The same can be said for it being f/f or otherwise Sapphic, if romance is involved – Not required, but something i am looking for. Ideally i'd be looking for YA (Young Adult) or NA (New Adult) book. Adult is fine but in my experience it seems to be a coin flip as to whether the book is a masterpiece of prose, or the author gets a bit too verbose to the point where it becomes confusing.

The only books i've come across that even remotely approach this is "Of Fire and Stars" Series by Audrey Coldhurst (But its not seen till the second book, and even then neither of the leads get that ability), and "Talon" by Julie Kagawa (but thats less "Shapeshifting Humans" than it is "Dragons taking human form in order to hide")

Thanks in advance!