It was a fantastic train-wreck; I loved every moment of it.
I’ll start by saying I understand why some people can’t get into this book. It’s not a conventional story of a conflict to overcome, rather it’s a slice of life within a depressed woman’s mind that reads almost like a diary. It’s fascinating and yet uncomfortably relatable (I’m okay I swear!)
some unorganized thoughts I have after finishing it…
Esther is a hypocrite and hates herself because of it. It’s never explicitly stated but she constantly brags about how she thinks she’s so above everything else yet she is constantly reminded just how average or even below average she is. She constantly self sabotages and digs her hole even deeper. Her environment is of course no help as she aspires to be more than her community would even allow a woman. As it’s aptly put in the book, she wants to be everything.
What’s really fascinating is the second half of the book. She shuts down near completely and as a reader we are hit with the full force of the times. The quackery of mental health practitioners in the second half are so laughably inane it seems unreal. It’s like they did everything in their power to make her worse. In a way she had already been dead long ago after the sleeping pills incident, her time in a institution was that of a ghost or zoned out zombie. As the book became thinner and thinner and I realized my time with Esther was coming to an end I felt sick at just how content everyone seemed with themselves. Esther is sick and it wasn’t anybodies fault but her own \[give me a break\], but now she’s okay and is ready for the final interview.
What did y’all think?
I’m certain there was a lot of in between lines that I missed and of course for brevity sake I spoke very shortly on the details but don’t worry, I most certainly plan on reading it again sooner rather than later.
by [deleted]