There’s been a lot of hype for this book, so I was expecting a more-so-than-normal interesting celebrity memoir, but what I’m reading goes so far and beyond what I expected. The subject matter itself has been talked about to death by now in the news cycle and on Reddit so I won’t go into that too much – you know what you’re getting into here. Instead, I wanna talk about the rest of what her book is about.
Jennette has a distinct writing voice and we learn quickly that she always wanted to be a writer since it was the one part of her life she had any control over, to the point where she wrote whole screenplays just for herself which she shared with her mother (the titular, *ahem*, well… you all know at this point).
This book has completely changed my perspective not only on iCarly (I don’t know if I could honestly ever watch it again and be able to enjoy it in the same way after this), but child stardom in Hollywood in general. The abuse she went through as a child went far beyond whatever you’re expecting to the point where you will probably be shocked by how underdeveloped and naive she was even at the age of 18. There are genuinely moments where I wanted to put the book down because it got so uncomfortable to read but it was so engrossing and affective, so *honest* that I burnt through half the book in just a few hours.
I know it’s sold out in so many places already, but I highly, highly recommend any 90s/00s Nickelodeon fans to pick this one up (or download the Ebook) if you can. She’s also working on a novel right now and I can say with confidence as I read this that I’ll be checking it out.
Also just want to add that I have an incredible respect for Miranda Cosgrove now, more than I would’ve expected, and the chapters dealing with their initial friendship are particularly interesting when you juxtapose them with their characters from iCarly – almost a role-reversal in the real world.
by mutual_raid
42 Comments
I tried reading that but couldn’t continue. It reminded me way too much of my own experiences. All I can really say about it (that I’m willing to say) is that her writing style is really good.
I have it on order at my bookstore. I’m so excited.
I have it on my iPad waiting to read after I finish the library book that’s due back. But I want to just recommend her podcast if you haven’t listened. I haven’t listened to every episode but I found her to be so well-spoken and introspective
Just downloaded and started this today. I’m not super familiar with the actress, as I’m a bit older than her fanbase and the kids I work with are too little. But ever since I’ve started reading articles about this book, I’ve been intrigued!!
I have it on hold on my Libby account, estimated wait time ~24 weeks 🥴. I am glad to hear it lives up to the hype and so many people are interested in it! Good for her.
I finished this book in one sitting (which is really saying something, considering I’ve barely been able to read anything for more than ten or fifteen minutes at a time recently). I couldn’t put it down. It’s such a rough read emotionally but the writing is incredible. She’s a really talented writer and I hope we see more from her in the future.
If anyone wants a recap of it while waiting to read, the podcast “Celebrity Memoir Bookclub” did a great episode this week about it.
I still barely know who Jennette McCurdy is but I read an excerpt from her book the other day that got me seriously contemplating picking it up. I think I’ll do it.
I must confess: I feel the same way about my biological father, and the title really spoke to me because of that. I grew up with a father who barely let me and my siblings go anywhere, abused them and my mom on a regular basis, and when he died, it was kind of like God said: “Now’s your chance. Go live your lives.” I love the title of the book because it’s honest and stripped down to the bare bones. I would never have the GUTS to go into detail about what happened before I turned ten, but I am so excited to read this novel because she spoke the truth about abuse, and a lot of people go through it; some people live to tell it and some don’t.
This book is very very good, read it in an evening, funny but wrenching at the same time. She is a fantastic writer.
I burned through the audiobook in less than 24 hours. Really well done. Crystal clear in the granular retelling of her experiences.
Finished the book today and I had a hard time writing a review for it. It almost felt wrong since its such a personal memoir. I also could not stop reading the book she has a really good writing style and like you said OP when her novel comes out I’ll definitely read that
Blown away is right! I’m typically iffy on celebrity memoirs but I knew I had to have this one. I pre-ordered the audiobook (which is narrated by Jennette) and finished it in a day as well. Her story was so well told — raw, authentic, vulnerable — I felt completely immersed in her experiences. She has so much heart and I have so much respect for her. I just wanna give her a big hug honestly
I am 453rd in line for the ebook at my local library. I’ll get to enjoy the book in about 2 years at that rate 🙃
I listened to the audiobook and I had to keep stopping to just let it all sink in. I normally listen on 1.5 speed, but with the subject matter, I had to listen at regular speed because this deserved the respect of my full attention. When someone reads their own memoir there’s always that level more vulnerability to it, and there were several points where if it was a fiction piece you know the reviews would be marked down for ‘flat tone’ but here- fuck. It’s someone recounting their abuse and trauma and absolutely the fact that we’re able to hear her sharing this with us overrules any preferences people have for audiobook tone.
I finished it last night and I was a wreck at work because I kept thinking about the book. Definitely changed my perspective of iCarly, and how much of Sam’s character was linked to food and jokes about her mother.
I reccomend listening to the audio book — she narrates it and it really takes it to a different level of “personal”. I’ve been listening to it since yesterday and blew through half of it without even realizing because it’s that engrossing.
I forgot to mention, her history with Mormonism and the fact that she grew up in a hoarder’s house literally sleeping on a mat on the floor with her brothers, in the living room, *even while she was filming iCarly* are two things I’ve never seen brought up in the news cycle and are worth mentioning here.
If you want more from her, she had a podcast called Empty Inside. The subject matter is similar but it’s an interview format where her guests also talk about their experiences with the industry. The David Archuletta episode was really eye opening.
This type of stuff is a real black hole that is finally coming to light, and her book is a huge brave step in the right direction.
/r/raisedbynarcissists
I didn’t know anything McCurdy outside of knowing she was an actress, and iCarly was a few years after my time. This book permeates the barriers of fame and excess, and speaks to anyone who had an abusive upbringing. It’s frequently funny, but always serious. No matter her overall success, someone much more famous than I will share a link with me. I don’t know that I’ve seen a celebrity memoir that emphasizes that as much as this.
Knowing everything I know now about her life has really made me question what the hell was going on in that iCarly writing room. So many things about Sam’s character seem to be directly making fun of Jeanette’s abuse.
Great write up. I have almost no idea who this human is. Missed iCarly and that generation of programming by about 5 years, but now I feel the need to learn what this poor girl was put through.
I was a little old for that era of Nickelodeon but I’m still really interested in reading it.
Just checked my library–they have 45 copies, with 7 holds per copy 😅 might have to wait til 2024 to get my mitts on it
This memoir is one of the best to come out in awhile. I didn’t know who she really was, as I was too old to watch her show back when it was on. But, when this was circling the trades a few months ago it piqued my interest. The more clips that came out, I knew I had to read it. Darn, it is a real look behind the scenes of a child star that really shows the dark areas of Hollywood and it is tough.
I am glad that she tapped into what she really wanted to do and found her purpose because she was in a bad place. Writing is truly her outlet and I hope we get to see more from her beyond this painfully personal piece. She has so much talent. I give her credit for being able to tell this cautionary tale and on her terms.
I’m currently in the middle of it and man, it might be the saddest thing I’ve read this month, maybe the year. Her and her mom shared an eating disorder. That’s how they bonded. That is messed up.
If anyone wants a good overview of the shows without watching them yourself, the YouTube channel Quinton Reviews has some very detailed breakdowns of the bizarre, semi-related, Nickelodeon televised universe.
https://youtube.com/c/QuintonReviewsKitchenSinks
ICarly was one of the very few kids shows that I could sit and watch with my kids. It was wholesome, well acted, and just plain fun. I know Jennette went through a lot of shit, so after your recommendation I’ll give the book a go.
Every time I hear “But she’s your mother!”, I want to grit my teeth until they shatter. It triggers me beyond belief. My mother was a chronic alcoholic. She was abusive, not hands on, but through severe neglect. I won’t go into it, but know that her death, at a young 62, made me so happy. When I picked up her ashes, I was house sitting at the time for a friend who had four cats. Guess where my mother’s ashes ended up. In the litter box. She was finally useful. It was over and all my hate died with her.
Just started the audiobook today thanks to your post… Holy shit I will never let my kid be a child actor.
Page 1 Jennette drops you into her dysfunctional/ entertainment first worldview that was pressed upon her by her mentally unwell mother.
I know there is plenty more I haven’t gotten yet but so far from what I’ve heard completely changes how I view child actors in hollywood.
I will be highly recommending this book to a number of people.
It’s terrifying to think that things are MUCH better than they were in the 80s, which is disturbing to think how bad they still are. She went through so much and without a parent to help guide her she really went through far more than any child should ever deal with.
Her wit and writing style remind me a lot of Carrie Fisher. It really does sound like this book was cathartic for her.
I’ve never been totally on board with child stardom for this reason. Kirsten Dunst comes to mind as one of the weird examples of a child star who turned out fairly well adjusted because her mother took her being a child seriously. Unlike Jennette McCurdy‘s mother, Kirsten Dunst indicated that her mother did everything in her power to protect her and ensure that she had a childhood in spite of her being a star. I can also totally understand Jennette McCurdy expressing relief to be free from the authority of someone who abused her. I pray she is able to find healing and peace now that her mother has died.
>I have an incredible respect for Miranda Cosgrove now, more than I would’ve expected
Oh thank God
I was just too old for iCarly when it was relevant. Is it still an interesting read or will a lot be lost on me?
Currently listening to the audiobook version right now, read by Jennette. I don’t have the vocabulary to describe it, but it’s chilling and close and intimate.
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Those Nic producers were so abusive and exploitative to all those kids. Victorious just had straight up overtly sexual and inappropriate scenes, and that’s not even including the SUPER uncomfortable web exclusive content.
Watching former child stars implode over the years it’s hard not to be worried about kids that get big. Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Amanda Bynes, Michael Jackson, the list goes on.
Almost every adult in this book is depressingly gross and negligent. The mother is an all-timer though. This could be a horror movie.
I met her once, when I was 11. It was really odd, but my dad randomly knew someone with her crew, and so I was allowed on her tour bus for a few minutes for a private meet n greet. She was so so kind. I remember telling her my whole “life plan” (or at least my 11yo version lol), and how she acted super interested, asked me questions, and told me “I was the most put together 11 year old she’d ever met”. The fact that “Sam from iCarly” said that was a *huge* deal for me at the time, and I’ve always been really grateful to her for being so encouraging.
That memory was always so sweet to me (if a little awkward!), but now it’s like… she really managed to be that kind to a total stranger kid who was thrown in her face at like 9pm at night, after what was definitely a LONG day full of tour stuff, and while also in the midst of this hellish trauma.
I love the way she wrote the book into little vignettes that only go on for 3-4 pages usually. It made it so digestible despite the difficulty of the subject matter. It also presented a good ‘ok just one more’ reading experience; kind of like how watching a tv show seems like less of an investment than watching a movie, even though a full season of a show is much longer. Great work to capture today’s reading audience whose attention spans are more tuned by visual media than written pieces.
I’m also reading this. My daughter loved iCarly and actually, so did I. Sam was always interesting to me as a character and reading about Jenette’s real life just destroys me.
She was sat in a car seat at age 14. She was that small and deprived of food and love, she still required a booster car seat. jfc. I am sending her ALL the positivity and I wish I could give her a hug.
Edit I’m coming back to say that I’ve finished the book and I don’t think I can ever look at certain things the same, ever again. Jenette’s voice is so powerful and authentic; I will be thinking about this book for a long time.
I loved how she really wrote the early chapters in the voice of her younger self. Like how she didn’t call her OCD OCD until she actually got a diagnosis.