(maybe TW, I’m not sure) ok sorry this might be long-
An insightful book(could be disguised as a novel or just a self-aware/self-help book) that’ll make my brown mother(50F) reflect on her 20 year long marriage and make her realize that my father is manipulative, condescending, plays mind games with her and does not respect her at all; that behind his charming facade with everyone else, is a truly rotten man and she’s right about that. He gaslights her and makes her question her sanity, and also makes her feel like the problem. He gets easily mad and violent, doesn’t let her talk to her family much and insults them, nitpicks everything she says(like- if she asks him ‘hey, aren’t you gonna have dinner?’, he goes blind with rage and starts screaming ‘WHY DID YOU ASK THAT QUESTION, WOMAN? IS IT BECAUSE YOU WANT ME TO SAY NO? YOU WANT ME TO NOT EAT? NEXT TIME SAY ‘PLEASE, EAT’ OR I’LL KILL YOU’, yeah every single little thing like that). My mother is a professor but he makes her do all the household chores too AND look after me n my sister, and calls her names if she forgets to do just one thing. Oh and he’s also been romantically involved with another co-worker woman during their whole marriage and my mother feels like it’s her fault(because he tells her that her earning more than him isn’t okay because she’s the woman in the household- yes he’s a patriarchal insecure leech- and because she’s ‘fat'(her postpartum belly didn’t go away after my sister was born) and ugly(she’s just brown and has acne scars).
So I just want a book that’ll show all the signs and tell her how he’s the one who’s bad. A book that’ll discuss the various ways a manipulative and gaslighting husband schemes, that’ll make her be able to see ALL the little ways he’s ruining her.
by itsthedevilsmistress