Don’t batter me with hate, this was a joke story made when the Ohio joke thingy was still popular. Due to how long it is, I’ll release it chapter by chapter and let me know your thoughts:
Chapter 1 “The Dingle Family”:
I wake up in a forest shrouded in mist, it’s smoke covering my crooked body. The rain showers down on the area and the lightning screams into the night. My shivering hands manage to push my frozen body above the mist. It’s as if I’m walking through water. Suddenly I hear, “hEy!!1!”. I turn to look around. There’s no one there. I begin to move again, slowly ambling my way to the outskirts of the dense darkness that was the Ohio National forest. As I step my foot into the green grass, a shadowy figure appears out of nowhere! The person seems to be wearing a hoodie, with peculiar SpongeBob merchandise coating it. I see his dark mouth open, his pearly white teeth opening wide. It begins to let out a horrid laugh!
“hAhAhHAhAhaHaAhAhAAaAaAaA!!!!!!1!”
The ground shakes and my feet sink into the grass. I struggle to pull them out of the ground, my icy hands twitching while gripping onto my faulty ripped blue jeans. I look back up, and I find a young black man standing in front of me. He’s no longer wearing the hoodie and amusing SpongeBob merchandise, instead it’s replaced with a white tank top, a brownish-dark belt around his tight waist, black jeans, and (possibly fake) Jordan’s. He also possesses an abnormally long nose, giving me an uncanny feeling and further solidifying his weird aura.
“mY nAmE iS QuAnDaLe dInGlE, NiCe tO mEet a fElLow OhIoaN!!1!1”, he says.
I say, “Uh…..hey. So, you’re from Ohio right?”
“suRe aM!1!1!!”, the man says.
“And your name is….Quindele-“
“NO!” The man says firmly while looking at me with his emotionless eyes. His voice slightly deepens when expressing his denial.
“MY NAME….iS qUaNdAlE dIngLe!1!!1”
“So, Quandale, do you know any safe areas in Ohio or anything like that sort? I sorta just woke up here in the forest,” I say nervously, trying to maintain a somewhat normal conversation.
“sAfE? HaHaHaAhAhahAhAhAhaAa!1!! iF yOu diDn’T kNoW OhIoaN, tHeRe iS nO sAfE PlAcE hErE iN OhIO!!11!”
As soon as I hear this, I begin to sweat profusely. As I’m frozen in place, the only way out of certain death I couldn’t think of was to initiate the conversation with Quandale.
“How….about we go somewhere in Ohio then?” I say, blabbering and gulping beneath my fake smile.
“hMmM lEmMe tHiNk…..oH yEs! I gOt tIcKlE tImE iN aN HoUr sO I HaVe gOt tImE!!” My eyes widen after that sentence.
“T-ti-‘tickle time’?”
“boO yEaH!! MY UnClE lIkEs iT a LoT!!1! ReEhEeHeEhEeHeE!!1!!1” Due to the sheer amount of fear I’ve amassed from this man, I do not question any further. Suddenly, Quandale begins to dance in an odd fashion in front of me.
“…..wh-what was that?” I ask.
“oH yOu dOn’T KnOw? iT Is tHe gRiDdY!1!” I look at Quandale with a confused expression on my face, not knowing what the “griddy” was.
“So, uh, let’s go now!” I say with an excited attitude. “AlRigHt dUdE!1!1” Quandale replies. We begin to walk through the wide field at night, the wind swaying the tall grass we traverse through. Quandale begins to hum subtly.
“Hmmmmmmm…..”
“Uh, Quandale…why are you humming?” I ask him.
“oH nOtHinG. JuSt lIkE mUsIc…” I begin to curiously answer personal questions after Quandale’s face descends into an emotionless terror to keep the light mood going.
“Quandale….do you have parents?”
Quandale doesn’t answer for a few seconds and his sighs of hesitations are clear and loud. But then, he ushers serious information.
*This is the first half of Chapter 1, I tend to make my chapter a bit too long. Let me know your thoughts. This was made when I was 12 in 2019.*
by JokeiMaster57