Tell me about books that will make me cry, vomit, scream into the void. Something that will send me down a spiral of questioning my existence and what is humanity and what is good.
I liked Tender is the Flesh and A Certain Hunger and have been wanting to find similarly disgusting books that make me regret my existence. Something that has a lot of weird elements and body horror. I find reading about cannibalism makes me retch the most so suggestions that have that theme are ✨chefs kiss✨
I also want to read about themes like self harm or eating disorders but I want it to not only be about shocking the reader but a visceral reality of having to deal with those issues, preferably without sugarcoating.
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120 Days of Sodom (or Salò) by Marquis de Sade. The first few pages are gross and I stopped reading. It gets worse. Lots of warnings for this one.
Impulse by Ellen Hopkins is a YA novel about three teenagers who are institutionalized after attempting suicide. Difficult to read for some people.
Sagawas Manga made my mother disgusted. It’s pretty wild.
Blood Meridian is not a good time.
Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z. Brite! a necrophilic, cannibalistic, serial killer love story 🥰
Crash by JG Ballard. I read it right after The Kindly Ones by Jonathan Littel, which I did not think could be topped in terms of repulsiveness (it was indeed topped by crash).
Tampa by Alissa Nutting (female pedophile, in her perspective). And Dead Inside by Chandler Morrison (necrophilia, cannibalism of dead babies).
Woom by Duncan Ralston
I’ll also second Dead Inside mentioned above.
Taken by the Trex is pretty gross.
There are plenty of similar titles by her involving all sorts of zooletry.
Also like, Blood Meridian I *guess*. If you’re a square
The Stars are Legion by Kameron Hurley has gross birth and pregnancy related horror. The people live on biological ships to which each person give birth to a piece of the ship when a replacement is needed. As you can imagine there are no men. There is a lot of gross body stuff and also cannibalism.
Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk. Apparently people would regularly pass out during live readings
As someone with an eating disorder for 16 years who has seen every stage of the illness, “Wasted” by Marya Hornbacher was the most spot on for me. As for screaming into the void, Panzram. Obviously.
To be devoured by Sara Tantlinger
Principles of Mathematical Analysis